There are the natural phases that long term relationships and marriages go through that affect passion in the bedroom.
As a Relations Advisor and Writer, I have the opportunity to not only speak to people who are hitting road blocks in their relationships but I also interview experts who have been trained in special fields and can provide insights to enhance relationships.
Recently I had the privilege to talk to Dr. Dudley Seth Danoff, who is a men’s urologist and expert for more than thirty years in his area of expertise. Based out of Los Angeles, Dr. Danoff has helped many couples spice up their sex lives as he has the medical knowledge that explains the complexity and mystery of the male anatomy.
Our conversation was eye opening as it balanced both the male and female perspective on how to keep passion and excitement in long term relationships ensuring you have many years of sexual connection and longevity with your life partner. Enjoy the following tips to spark passion back in your relationship.
1. Keep Boredom out of the Bedroom
Do everything in your power to keep sex from being a dull routine. Keeping things interesting in the bedroom prevents a man from looking outside the relationship for sexual satisfaction and connection.
Men are very visual and easily stimulated so it is fairly easy for a woman to spice things up in a bedroom if you really put your mind to it. Also take the time to lead up to the grand event. Foreplay or conversations over text with your partner prior to a sexual experience is all part of the fun so use your spare time to tease your partner to maximize the fun and entertainment.
2. Pay Attention to Your Body’s Rhythms
Fatigue affects sexual energy. Pay close attention to the way the body responds to emotional and physical conditions. According to Dr. Danoff, sexual response will change with stress.
Sometimes the amount of exercise and types of food can affect you negatively so be open to figuring out what works for you so you are at your best rhythm. Through trial and error mix your routines up till you find that balance that maximizes your energy and state. Working long hours or the pressures of family life can cause stress, so ensure that you are making time for sex between you and your partner. Sex is a stress reliever after all.
This was fun to chat about with Dr. Danoff as he encouraged couples to experiment having sex at different times of the day. Sex is not just a night time activity and most couples are exhausted by the time night time arrives so explore various times of the day.
“Morning sex is a good way to start the day and could be just as invigorating as a morning jog” recommends Dr. Danoff. He also reiterated paying attention to your rhythms and your partner’s rhythms and when it is best to have sex so both of you are at your highest energy state.
4. Look at Alternate Sex Practices
Dr. Danoff suggests reading various books and articles to introduce alternate sex practices such as the Kama Sutra. Ask yourself the question: “When have you done something other than the missionary position?” – suggest Dr. Danoff. The possibilities are endless and he suggests reading and expanding your mind to explore with your partner sexually.
Changing venues to increase the excitement is also recommended (ahem, I’m throwing that one in). Depending on how risky you are, this is an area that you and your partner can have a lot of fun with.
5. Connect Emotionally
This is more for the male readers to pay attention to. Women need the emotional connection to feel the security required to trust and let go in moments of sexual pleasure.
Take the time to reconnect with your lover and book some time away on a weekend without kids, phones and other distractions. Your woman is more likely to want to be with you physically the moment you connect with her emotionally.
There are many aphrodisiacs such as the traditional roses and chocolates which can work up to a certain point but hands down the greatest aphrodisiac is Love. This was definitely a point that both Dr. Danoff and I agreed upon. Remember that sex without love can be fun however sex with meaningful lasting love is divine. For those of you in long-term relationships, take the time to deepen your love while you spark passion back with your partner.
If you are interested in Dr. Danoff’s perspectives, follow him on facebook and twitter. (links below and can be hyperlinked)
Dr. Dannoff’s Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Penis-Power-The-Ultimate-Guide-to-Male-Sexual-Health/183575841672858
Dr. Dannoff’s Twitter Link: https://twitter.com/DrDanoff (@DrDanoff)