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So often I come across people who put an endless amount of pressure on themselves to find a relationship and when they do, it can be all too easy to carry that pressure into the relationship itself.

To want something so badly for so long and then to finally have it, you could be forgiven for not knowing what to do with it now that it’s finally here.

Here is my simple guide to making a success of your new found love:

Be yourself.

New Relationship With Romantic Couple EmbracingLet’s get the obvious out of the way. An age old cliché but when it comes to relationships never was a truer word spoken. Have faith that who you are is enough because if it’s not then you’re with the wrong person. It really is as simple as that.

Sometimes when we meet people it’s easy to hide your flaws and occasionally adopt personality traits that you know aren’t entirely true to you. But at the end of the day, if this person really is the one then who you are and I mean who you really are should always be enough. I’m a firm believer that there is at least one true love out there for everyone, don’t waste your time with those who don’t deserve it.

Don’t get ahead of yourself.

This can be difficult, I admit. When you meet someone you really click with, it’s difficult not to get ahead of yourself but try to remember that if it’s meant to be it will happen for you – what’s the rush?

Talk of wedding bells and kids a few weeks into the relationship could be described as a touch romantic but some may argue that it’s also a touch desperate and perhaps a tad full on. I always say there is nothing less attractive than desperation, it’s flattering for someone to care about you to such a degree but don’t ever sell yourself short with irrational demands. If it’s right then all those things will happen in time.

Know what you want.

One thing I’ve learned from experience is to know exactly what you want from a relationship. Sometimes when we like someone we compromise everything we want and need to make the other person happy and as noble as that seems sometimes it can lead us to become someone that we are not (see rule 1).

New Relationship With Couple Taking SelfieHave fun.

I don’t want you to blow your new relationship but I also don’t want you to worry about it. The start of a new relationship is one of the most incredible feelings you can experience in this life – embrace it!

Make the most of every second, stay positive and just enjoy this new found blessing. Every single day we have an opportunity to create new memories, don’t let it go to waste.

Get to know your new partner.

Obviously you know each other to an extent otherwise you wouldn’t be a couple but I mean really get to know them. Find out what makes them tick, what makes them laugh and what makes them cry. Understand who they are, if you do then you will have all the knowledge you need to make a success of the relationship. Talk and be open with each other, no one enjoys the company of a brick wall.

All in all trust that everything happens for a reason, trust that you are on the right path and believe that you are good enough without compromising who you are. Try not to over-analyze things, this is a relationship not a school project.

Relax and let things take their natural course. If things don’t work out try not to be too downhearted, time (and laughter) is a great healer and you just never know who may be waiting to come into your life. When people tell you everything happens for a reason don’t try and prove them wrong, just be patient.

Paul Thomas Bell

Scottish born Paul Thomas Bell is a young writer who has gained a worldwide following through his dating and relationships blog, His honest and expressive stories of men and their ways has proven particularly popular with female readers and gained critical acclaim from Oprah Winfrey featured relationship expert Susan Winter. Paul has written for FHM and various publications in both the UK and US. As well as finishing his first book Paul will also be taking his first steps into the world of documentaries in the coming months. Follow him on twitter @paulthomasbell.

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