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Caleb asks…

Hi Mike. I’m Caleb. I usually date models, but I met this girl at a bar and I was totally drawn to her. She is petite and very girl next store pretty, but she has this spark that makes me think she would be amazing in bed. I took her out last week and I spared no expense because I really wanted to impress her. I kept telling her that I was so happy to see her because she is so real and different from the girls I usually date, and that I could imagine her being way more fun and interesting in private. She eventually said, “I get it, you like that I’m a real girl. Enough about the models.” I thought that was really cool and the rest of the night went really well. I texted her a couple of days later, asking if I could cook her dinner at my place, and she hasn’t answered. I don’t get it. I am above average in the looks department, make a lot of money, and I’m totally attracted to her – which I made very clear. Why wouldn’t she want to see me again?”—Caleb

Hey Caleb,

Man, I read your question during podcast recording the other day and Nora was ready to jump through the microphone and throttle you.

But I’m nicer about these things (probably because I’m a guy and totally understand the desire to stay unattached and date models.)

Anyway, a couple important things:

1. Dating models has probably given you a pretty skewed view of women in general. I mean, if all you date are models you probably think all women are addicts who are awful in bed (seriously, every time I’ve been with a model it’s been a really awful experience. Maybe it’s the rib bones poking into my chest. Or the self loathing. Or fact that she keeps hallucinating that my junk is a turkey sandwich. Or all of the above.)

2. Real women generally get really annoyed and think you’re a douchebag if you spend your entire date talking about how “You’re not as hot as the girls I usually date but there’s something about you I really like.”

Even though you thought the date you had with this girl went well, she probably spent the entire time on an anthropological expedition mentally filing everything you said away so she could make fun of you later to her girlfriends (or her F buddy.)

Plus all the “Model talk” was actually incredibly insulting to her. Even though you thought you were being nice, you were actually making her acutely aware of how she’s NOT a model.

3. If you want to date REAL women (who have brains in their heads and make money in ways that have nothing to do with their breasts) you’ve got to be a REAL guy. That means actually having something to talk about besides how much money you have or how good looking you are.

I’m not saying making money is a bad thing (and it’s WAY easier to meet and date hot girls when you’ve got something in the bank).

But I am saying that if that’s ALL you’ve got to offer you’re simply never going to have a real relationship with a girl. If all you want is to sleep with a bunch of women, that’s fine. You can do that.

But I’ll tell you right now that the skills that make you good at picking up “professional breasts” are actually the absolute opposite skills than what you need to have a relationship with a real girl.

So . . .

1. Give up on this girl. You’ve done too much damage.

2. Besides “money and looks” what else do you have going for you? What are you passionate about? What gets you out of bed in the morning? Once you’ve got the “Bills are paid and I’m not an ugly troll” thing out of the way, women are actually attracted to PASSION more than anything else.

If you haven’t already, you should go pick up "Make Her Beg To Be Your Girlfriend" on Amazon.

It’s just 3 freaking bucks and it’ll change your life.

Michael Fiore

Internationally recognized as the foremost expert on how to have great relationships in the modern world, Michael is blunt, funny, and always honest.

In 2011, Michael appeared on “The Rachael Ray” show with his popular “Text The Romance Back Program” (Rachael said he gave her “chills”). Since then Michael has given women X-Ray vision into men’s minds with “The Secret Survey”, helped thousands rebuild relationships with “Text Your Ex Back”, and has become an Amazon Best Selling Author.

Michael lives in Seattle, WA and is currently hard at work on his next shocking, straightforward and really, really useful program.

What Do You Think?

3 Comments | Join the discussion

  • chris Nov 1, 2013 at 2:22 am

    The douchbag who wrote in is a straight up dumbass and gives the rest of us men a bad name. And then after insulting her throughout dinner, texts her to “cook dinner at his place”? The only thing he could have said to make that more like a date raper is ask what kind of liquor she likes with roofies.

  • Linda Oct 18, 2013 at 11:44 am

    At least she got a free meal out of the deal. And probably enjoyed the food more than any model would. lol
    Don’t get me wrong, I like good looking guys, but more often than not it is just easier dating someone who merely nice looking. They aren’t so stuck on themselves. Guys usually think they are way better looking than they really are anyway, so starting with gorgeous just makes it that much harder. 😛

  • Julia Oct 18, 2013 at 8:23 am

    Wow, another one like Hank! Who are these people? It’s like reading about characters in a TV show set in Hollywood…

    That being said, “I’ll cook you dinner at my place” is also not a good idea for a SECOND date.


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