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7 Steps to Make You Feel Fabulous and Keep Him Hot and Bothered

I bet if you asked 100 women if they would like to have sex with the man they love every single day for a year, you’d get at least a few looks of horror. But from 100 men, you’d get one hundred giant grins (and hard-ons). And a few “How many times a day?” responses.

At least one woman took the challenge very seriously, and not for the reasons you might imagine.

Making the decision to learn to really enjoy sex with the man you love can totally change your life. As one commenter on the Huffington Post article said, “Life is too short for ugly underwear and boring sex.” Hear, hear.

But it’s more than that, isn’t it? Because when you are having mind-shattering, earth-moving, orgasmic… or even just ordinary good sex, there are other things at work as well.

1. OWN your gorgeousness.

I’m forever telling you how amazingly beautiful you are, and I’m absolutely right about that, because you ARE wonderfully made, seriously astonishing, and altogether gorgeous. But until you claim that and start treating yourself like the queen you are, your sexual experience will be less than you deserve.

2. Deal with your baggage.

Lots of people have horrible past experiences – some of them dating from childhood – that interfere with their ability to believe in themselves. If you know this is holding you back, decide to invest in your own brilliant future by getting help. If you can’t afford a great therapist, turn to a trusted mentor or a cherished, well-adjusted friend.

3. Become the sexy, confident mistress of your own life.

No one is in charge of your life except you! So create a vision in your mind of the powerful, sensual, and utterly confident woman you intend to become. Then sit down and journal some of the things you need in order to become that wonderful woman. Make a plan to start meeting those needs, because the world is waiting for more amazing women like that!

4. Pay attention to the sensual.

Drink in plenty of nutrients, some dappled sunshine, regular affirmation, gentle exercise, and inner peace. Soak up the beauty you find all around you; revel in silky scarves, steamy baths, sparkling starlight, and fragrant scents. The more you become attuned to the many simple yet profound pleasures of life, the more erotic and beautiful you feel.

5. Learn what feels good to your body.

If you can learn to pleasure your own body, and do it extremely well, the man you love will find you incredibly arousing in bed and you’ll never lack for sexual satisfaction. Not only will he love watching you experiencing great pleasure, he will feel aroused to be a part of that. Tell him – wait, no! – show him how to pleasure you. Boom. Fireworks.

6. Become the queen of foreplay.

The best sex is when it happens all day before the actual intercourse. Tease, tantalize, seduce. Initiate! Don’t wait for him to do it. Whisper, text, arouse. Smile, wink, stroke, promise. He won’t believe his incredible great fortune. And you’ll feel more powerful and sexy than ever.

7. Give it all to the man who loves you and has your best interest at heart.

This one is last on the list for a good reason. Because when you are confident in your own beauty and capabilities, you attract all sorts of men, but you’ll CHOOSE the best ones and let the others go. A man who is growing and maturing in healthy ways, who will work to win your trust, and who has your best interest at heart is the one who should receive the wonderful gifts you have to offer.

I know it’s a tall order. Nobody learns to be a confident woman in charge of her own life or a sensual siren overnight. But it’s worth investing your time and energy in! When you love yourself and and you can freely and regularly luxuriate in steamy, passionate sex (no matter how many kids you have or how much the den needs to be vacuumed), both you and your man will be amazed at the difference it makes in your lives.

Grade Yourself

Your turn! On a scale of 1 (no sex at all) to 10 (I’m a sensual siren and my man can’t stop thinking about me), where is your sex life now, AND where would you like it to be? Which of the numbered areas above need some work and tender loving care?

Claire Casey

Claire Casey devotes her writing to empower women; to help you attract the kind of man who will treasure your heart like the rare gem it is.

Take the Love Number Quiz (free) and make this YOUR year for love. Complete guide to skyrocketing your Love Number *included* with the Quiz!

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