Have you been talking to someone online for a few weeks or months and feel like the time is finally right to set a romantic rendez-vous for two?
Great. But what are you going to do when you actually meet up? Are you going to start all over again, and act as though you barely know one another? Or are you going to go back to their place at the end of the day…?
Who knows?! You certainly don’t! It is probably a very confusing time. You kinda know what you want and expect from all of this, but you’re uncertain about what they want and expect. Plus, doesn’t etiquette have a role to play here? What about fricking etiquette?!
What would your mom have done?!
It’s not easy to know what to expect – or what to do – when we meet someone for the first time who we’ve been romancing online for the last few weeks or months. We’ve chatted with them via little text boxes, been on Skype with them, and we think we know them quite well. So far, so good. We’ve clicked, and it’s great.
But as our friends and family keep reminding us, “real life is a whole different ball game.” What happens online sometimes stays online, and once you meet offline, new guards and barriers are erected. You suddenly have to find different ways of feeling comfortable around each other again. Bashing out “I want you” in a drunken text message is one thing (shame on you :), but setting the sparks a flyin’ across a coffee table is a whole other ball game.
“I … I … like you.”
It’s nerve-wracking, and there are 101 questions spinning around inside your head.
- “Will they like me?”
- “OMG will I like them?”
- “Are we going to be a couple by the end of it?”
- “Is this a date??”
The good news for you is that you’re not setting a precedent. More and more people around the world are falling in love online, and have met up after chatting online for hours on end. Some purposely seek out others on dating sites, while others randomly hit it off, despite having absolutely no romantic intentions to start with.
Some even fly to different countries, and learn foreign languages to give the whole darn thing a chance (isn’t that romantic!).
And once you start to hit it off really well, the question “should we meet up?” just won’t go away.
So. Here we are. You’ve made the decision that you’re gonna meet up. To give you some confidence, let’s take a look at what you should do on that crucial first day together:
1. Relive a Memory
First-time meet-ups can be really awkward, and you need an ice-breaker to help soothe both your nerves. Chatting on Skype was as easy as 1, 2, 3, but this is not Skype anymore.
It’s REAL LIFE.
A good idea is to bring up a shared memory. Maybe you could both laugh about the time your dad walked in on your Skype session demanding to know where his underwear was, or perhaps you could talk about the time their internet connection shut off mid-conversation and you wrote a poem dwelling on the fact that they hated you (OK, maybe save that story for yourself).
All kidding aside, shared memories draw people together and strengthens bonds. So take a hike down memory lane!
2. Touch Them
The thing with talking online is that it’s very risk free. You don’t have to make much of a commitment and can disappear when things get awkward. Not so in real life.
The problem with talking online is that it’s impossible to communicate non-verbally. Don’t believe me? Try it! Sit back, fold your arms and communicate with them by smiling or massaging your screen. Within an hour of this, they’ll either think you’re insane or that you’re ghosting them.
In real-life situations, though, non-verbal communication plays a far greater role. Touching other people sends very powerful signals that can reveal our intentions. You can make them feel relaxed, happy, and even in love with you by touching them – something you just can’t do online.
Should you embrace them, hold their hands or even kiss them? Of course – but only if the moment feels right.
3. Be Direct
Okay, so you’ve travelled all this way to meet them. Maybe you took a train or even a plane. However you got here, you’ve invested time, money and energy in meeting this person. So it’s definitely important to be clear about your intentions and not leave any room for confusion.
Don’t treat this as just another first date. The chances are, it isn’t like that at all. Be up front about your feelings – feelings which have been building for a long time. Don’t be vague. You’re not starting at zero here. You guys already know each other quite well, and have perhaps already used the magical “I love you!” phrase. So act like it.
If you keep all of these things in mind, things are going to be great when you finally do see your crush face to face.
Find out how you can make a man not only love you, but make him ADDICTED to you… CLICK HERE!