I recently had a conversation with a client that I’m working with. We were discussing how online dating can be weird…mostly because of a slightly “weird” girl he just met.
He wondered if his frustrations with her short answers and untimely replies were legitimate. I told him, yes, especially when you consider that some people that are dating online have no desire to date offline…and she might be one of them.
His response to me was, “Really?”
Again…I said, “yes!”
In fact there are quite a few different types of people that you can meet online.
Here’s a look at a few ways that could breakdown:
1. The Online Attention Fiend
The first person that you can be online is the person that were talking about…The Online Attention Fiend, The OAF for short. The OAF loves all the online attention, but doesn’t want to meet offline. OAFs always seem to be busy when you try to meet them. They might disappear when you ask if “we can meet for coffee,” and sometimes if you can talk on the phone.
Beware of The OAF not just because they don’t want to meet, but because usually OAFs have created an online persona that is fake.
Nobody has time for that!
2. The Stalker
The next person you can meet online is The Stalker. The Stalker wants to marry you within 24 hours of your first meeting, or thinks that you should be ready to marry them at “hello.” Stalkers are also easy to identity because they lay out all their cards from jump. Do not be flattered, nor attempt to make them slow down. This is The Stalker’s M.O. it will probably work for them one day… but don’t let that day be with you.
While there are a few more personas you can meet online, I will close with my favorites. The Oblivious and The Natural.
3. The Oblivious
The Oblivious are the socially awkward guys and gals who are trying to date online-because someone told them it might be easier for them, or because they have no time to socialize. They are nice and normal, but perhaps not well-versed in dating, which is why they are awkward. They usually have high intelligence and great jobs…but you have to be patient with them if you want this work out and also move to a face-to-face meeting before they bore you with overly long emails about NOTHING!
4. The Natural
The Naturals are great people, too…usually. They have great pics, great profiles and say all the right things. Sometimes this is good, and sometimes they are too good to be true. Discover their sincerity by asking hard questions, such as “why did your last relationship end?” or using a tool like 5-Minute Dating, which is in my book, The Business of Dating. Once you know what you’re dealing with–a genuine person, or a charmer–you can either carpe diem or cast your net.
If you haven’t heard, there are plenty of fish (not an endorsement, by the way), in the dating sea…so make sure you catch a winner!