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Confidence Wherever You Are? What Is the Secret…What is it about them? Picture it. You’re out for the evening, having a great time with your friends. All of a sudden, someone walks into the place and catches your eye.

You can’t quite seem to figure out why. However, this person, without saying a word, intrigues you.

They may not even be too physically attractive, but when someone displays confidence through body language, one can’t help but take notice.

With the body language component being approximately 55% in the 93% of non-verbal communication, it is involuntarily utilized every minute of each day.

However, the tips that people have heard in regards to this phenomena sometimes display more arrogance than confidence. So the mystifying person that catches your eye is displaying what is called “quiet” confidence by many.

Even though there are many aspects to body language, here are the top 4 ingredients that people find to be of utmost importance. Get ready to challenge what you’ve learned about showing confidence with the subtle acts of the truly secure!

1. Posture

Yes, we’ve all been told to “stand up straight.” However, standing up too straight adds an air of egoism that is not appealing. People tend to suck in their gut and puff out their chest to signal strength and superiority.

Truly self-assured people follow the saying “don’t slouch,” because it allows them to stand up straight while being more relaxed. Confident people are relaxed because what others think isn’t a concern.

2. Arm Movements

We have also learned that big and bold movements show that someone is dynamic. But ask yourself this: “are you an entertainer or politician?” We’ve heard that powerful people take up space or make themselves look “bigger”. And, depending on the circumstance, that is necessary at times.

On the other hand, when you’re self assured, smooth, nonchalant movements show that “quiet” confidence… which is fascinating. Used this way, movements show openness, decisiveness, and above all, are used to emphasize what the individual is saying.

3. Eye Contact

Confidence and How to Use it to Your Advantage in Meeting the Right PartnerIt’s a fact that confident people don’t shy away from eye contact. The “quiet” confident may have a happier stare, but we tend not to discuss how to look away. So much shows through the eyes, because it’s a way to give permission to “see” us.

However, people whose eyes dart away and quickly switch from one thing to another demonstrate anxiety and fear.

Those who are the “calm” before the storm take time to look away, but are doing so to observe their surroundings.

4. Smiling

When people are displaying a false sense of confidence, they purse their lips. Think of models, actors, or a number of profile pictures. The frame of mind behind this speaks “I’m better than you,” rather than, “we are equals.”

As one can observe, if someone is happy, they smile in a carefree way. Confident people are happy, as if they radiate positivity. They feel no need to compete because they have all the belief they need in themselves. What’s not to smile about?

You see, the “quiet” confidence that truly assured people display is natural. It’s authentic. Whether it’s the way they stand, the way they move, how they look around the room, or how they smile, one thing is for sure… these are people who do everything with a purpose. Everything is done with intention, and this is the most mysterious characteristic of all.

So, go out there and be quiet!

Jess Branas

Jess Branas is a dating coach, author, and radio personality who has quickly become the premier dating coach for the LGBTQ community. With her beginnings of catering specifically to women, she gained worldwide status with the release of her first book, “Seeking Her, Knowing You.” Currently heard as the dating expert for LesBe Real Radio Talk, she provides no-nonsense, straight forward advice to understanding the human mind of men and women alike in order to navigate the complex waters of the dating pool. You can check out more from Jess at

What Do You Think?

2 Comments | Join the discussion

  • Elaine west Oct 6, 2015 at 5:00 pm

    I love the tools on cofidence it give hope and a grest a. a great comfort to use thesr ad I fake it to it make it. when it comes to confidence becaue that is my weak ness I try too hard to be positive and bubblely thinking that this is what they want but deep down inside Im shy so these tools are extreamly helpful thank you jess with deep apreciation to all your help on dating and romance i often open uour book for good healthy resorses reguarding relationships s I need to read this to bost up my confidece and help with mt flaws in this area..Thank you Again Jess your such a great influce and with very authentic creative advice. xo love it .much love Elaine West


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