Somehow, a good deal us managed to loose touch with our own sexuality and exactly what that means to and for us.
For many, the word itself evokes great confusion, doubt, shame and often, deep deep sadness and pain. The associations and feelings that come with our sexuality extend much further what we learn or are led to believe on a surface level, or what the mind tells us. Conditioning, childhood and relationships all contribute to how we feel about and see our sexuality.
Past hurts and traumas can hold a significant charge in your body that contributes to you being out of touch with your feelings and your own being. Stuck energy and emotions can lay unaware in your system and lead to blockages that manifest in your relationships and love making. Often, sexuality can be confused with simply having sex. And sadly, very often, unsatisfying and disconnected sex.
In my work, I meet many beautiful souls who have simply forgotten the sheer beauty, innocence and intimacy that comes with being in touch with their own sexuality. This does not mean having ‘great sex‘ or ‘mind blowing orgasms‘ (although these of course are wonderful too) but to be fully connected to and present with your sexual energy.
In Tantra, ‘sexual energy’ ultimately means ‘life force energy’ and therefore, when we are not connected to our sexual energy and indeed our sexuality, we are not fully connected to life itself or our relationships.
So how do you begin to reclaim something that is your birthright? Something that is so pure and innocent and yet so misunderstood.
How do you begin to unravel the layers of discomfort that stop you from fully connecting with your sexuality?
To owning what is rightfully yours and to be able to not only enjoy it, but to express it, without fear or shame.
It all begins and ends with you and, rather than stepping away from your discomfort, beginning to move towards it. And that feels scary right? To imagine starting the process of actually facing your fears surrounding who you really are.
When I first started my journey into discovering who I really am and reclaiming my sexuality, I was terrified. Having experienced a lot of sexual trauma from a young age, I didn’t even believe that my sexuality was mine. I honestly felt it was for others to use as they wished and that I didn’t matter in any of it. But it reached a point when I needed to step up, begin healing and empower myself again.
And what I discovered was that this didn’t need to take years of therapy and talking. I began to realise that by getting in touch with my body, by beginning to love and appreciate my self, I could begin to live again. And that my sexuality meant being empowered as a sexual woman, being seen and no longer being afraid or ashamed of that.
Your sexuality is yours and nobody can take that from you. You have every right to own, rejoice and enjoy this- to take back what may have been lost and to begin to rediscover what it means to truly live this human life.
Begin today by simply taking a moment to sit with yourself. Whether you have two minutes or two hours, give this time for you. Close your eyes and begin to take some deep breaths into your body. Breathing deeply and slowing into your heart, allowing your breath to settle there for a moment. Feel yourself connected to your heart and the love that resides there.
When you’re ready, begin to move your breath to your belly. Breathing deeply and slowly into your belly. Again, allow your breath to rest there for a moment. Feeling connected to your belly, the emotions that you feel. Then, begin to move your breath to your sex. Taking deep, slow breaths into your sex, allow your breath to rest for a moment. Feeling connected to your sexuality, your vulnerability, your pleasure and your life force. Finally, taking one last, deep breath into your whole being- breathing in all that which serves you, breathing out all that you no longer need to hold on to…..
It’s never too late to start living, creating and expressing the life you so deserve. My longing for you is to truly live this life and to be the empowered, beautiful, sexual being that you are. To rediscover and connect with your own intimacy.