By · @askfelicity  ·  · 350 Shares

When feeling sexy is the last thing on your mind, Felicity has 8 ways to prove you still have it going on!

Let me guess… you feel pulled in a gazillion directions.

Sexier and Being Sexy to Attract MenWork responsibilities. Family life. Running a household. Keeping afloat financially. Trying to stay healthy. Shuttling kids to countless activities. Remembering field trips…and birthdays…and to take the trash out.

It’s no wonder that feeling sexy gets pushed down to the bottom of your never-ending to-do list.

Fer cryin’ out loud you are TIRED and just want to pull on a hoodie and some yoga pants, pour a gigundo glass of chardonnay and decompress. Feeling “hawt” is the last thing on your mind.

With everything we have going on, it’s no surprise we become disconnected from our “inner sex goddess” (ha!).

Believe me, I get it.

Can I admit something embarrassing? Looking at me today you probably would never guess this…


I wore granny panties and oversized sweaters for years after I had my kids. I even shuffled around town in MOM JEANS.

I was as far from feeling sexy as I could be! My Inner Sex Goddess was locked up in the shed out back (praise Jeebus she was eventually freed).

Before I tell you how I turned it all around, I want you to recognize that even if you feel as desirable as a pair of beige sweatpants, your sexy isn’t as far gone as you may think.

Here are eight ways I can prove that to you…

1. You Love Music

Alright, who doesn’t profess to loving music? Everyone loves music but most people don’t recognize the connection between music appreciation and sex drive.

Scientists have proven that listening to music contributes to the release of dopamine, the same feel-good chemical that we experience during sexual arousal.

Studies have shown that people with low sex drive and actually jump-start their libido by spending time jamming out to tunes.

See? All of those sexy mix tapes we made back in the day really did serve a purpose!

2. You Know Your Own Body’s Path to Pleasure

Whether from your own self-pleasure or that of a partner, you know what turns you on. Just reading that first sentence, you specifically recall exactly how you want to be touched, don’t you?

When you understand your body’s pleasure response and can communicate that to your partner, your enjoyment of sex easily quadruples. As does your partner’s.

Even if sex isn’t a current priority for you, you still know what you like.

3. You Ask Your Partner How He Wants to Be Pleased

Catering to your partner’s desires is the flip side to #1. There is nothing sexier than a generous lover who pays attention to heightening the experience of her partner. Even if you aren’t sure exactly what he wants, just taking the time to ask him makes you a goddess among mortals in his mind.

4. You Take Sensual Pleasure in Devouring Delicious Food

Eating is a highly sensual activity, just like sex. And our enjoyment of both activities stem from the same part of our brains.

Food and sex deeply overlap in our neurological response. Researchers have recently made a connection that women who savor and enjoy their food are more easily sexually aroused.

5. You Can Vividly Recall Past Romps So Strongly You Get Goosebumps

Our brains are our largest erogenous zones. Meaning, sexual arousal nearly always starts first in the brain which then triggers blood flow to our genitals. From there, our entire nervous system becomes heightened where even the slightest tickle creates shivers of pleasure.

When you conjure up detailed memories from past sexual experiences, your body responds. Even if you don’t feel like this item on the list speaks to you, I dare you to give it a try.

Think about a time where you were overcome with desire and experienced tremendous pleasure. Remember the details and replay the scenario in your imagination. And notice your body’s response, you little vixen.

6. You Have a Dirty Mind and Can Turn Anything Into an Innuendo

Sex is a form of play and playtime is FUN. Having an ability to infuse a little dirty humor in your daily life shows your minx-y nature underneath.

Even if you don’t go all Michael Scott and chime in “That’s what SHE said!” at every opportunity, just having those naughty thoughts correlates with your overall sexiness factor.

7. You Take Time to Indulge in Self-Care

I know, I know, “self-care” has become one of those annoying buzzwords that make tired and busy women feel guilty. But really, this kind of indulgence correlates with the sexual energy we emanate.

Things like bubble baths, splurging on high-quality beauty products, getting massages, and even simple things like sleeping in and then lounging in pj’s all day serve to delight our senses.

And the more in touch we are with our senses (aka sensuality) the more connected we become to our sexuality.

8. You Have at Least One Outfit You Feel Unstoppable In

The word “outfit” is actually inaccurate, because I don’t care if it’s a pair of killer heels, a great pair of jeans, or a daring push-up bra: As long as you have at least ONE item in your closet that makes you feel like sex on wheels, you got it goin’ on, sister.

Here’s a suggestion…on a day where you don’t even feel remotely sexy, trot out your IT item. Put it on. And look in the mirror and tell yourself just how amazing you are.

Ok, Felicity, my level of sexy is better than I thought, how can I improve it?

My hope is you read the list and discovered you are sexier than you imagined. But whether you are currently high-fiving your sexy self…OR you read these 8 signs and faintly recognize your long-lost self, I invite you to listen to this special FREE video I’ve created.

I share how I transformed my love life and sparked a tidal wave of lust in my guy. He beams with pride because he feels like he hit the sexual lottery.

Yes, with me, the former granny panties lady.

I’ve helped over 100,000 women turn their so-so love lives into things of absolute beauty. You should be next. Come watch this presentation right now!

Felicity Keith

Felicity Keith dishes advice on sex, dating, and love. She is the author of The Language of Desire and The Psystrology Method

Drop her a line at or to ask your burning relationship questions!

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